WEEK 10 JON BLANCHARD

A. Time spent this week
SS: 1 hour Morning Worship: 1 Hour Mid week: 1 hour Youth group: 1 hour Total Time: 4 Hours
B. My class this week
We are in week three of the “fireproofing your marriage” series. This week we talked more about the differences between the way men and women communicate. In the movie Fireproof, all of the struggles Caleb and his wife go through can be broken down into one basic issue: Cable desires respect from his wife and she wants to feel loved. Since neither person is receiving what they need, they are not reciprocating their spouse’s need. This causes much conflict and strife in a marriage, mainly because each person is out to meet their own needs instead of the other person’s. Marriage is about trusting when we love the other person fully, they will love us back in the way that we need.
Put downs and negative comments towards our spouse make men feel disrespected and make women feel they are not loved. Some exampled comments sound like this:
- That dress looks good, but you would look better if you lost a few pounds like you wanted to (women)
- You aren’t much of a fix-it man, why don’t you just call a repair man? (men)
In both cases, we are looking at our spouse in a judgmental light, telling them that they aren’t good enough. Rather than say what’s on our mind, we need to rethink the way we say certain things and how they are received by the other person. It isn’t difficult to be more tactful about our opinions: just be quiet more often.
I found myself a little bit frustrated with this lesson mainly because it places men into a negative light. The “put down” statements men make towards women seemed to include belittling questions about a woman’s physical appearance; the statements made by women always seemed to be simple and shallow, usually about being able to fix things. Are men lacking in depth? When I brought this idea up, I was told I was wrong and it was only my perception that things were this way.
C. Questions this week
1, What do you do when your Sunday school material isn’t a very good quality?
2. If your opinions are being discounted and ignored, how do you deal with it?